Observing people’s behavior and gaining awareness

東京の街-1 English

Hello. There is a saying, “Learn from others’ mistakes.” It means that if you look at the behavior of others and feel something, you should look back and change yourself.

When you see someone fail, look back and see if you’re okay.

A long time ago, I was angry at someone’s behavior and kept pointing it out. When I think about it now, I regret that I did something stupid. However, there was no way that someone would change their behavior just because I pointed it out.

Even if I give advice like, “If you do it this way, it will work out,” it doesn’t reach the other person’s ears. Because it’s “extra care”. The future predictions I see and the future predictions others see are often completely different. Even if someone has the same future prediction as me, it is the person who decides whether to act or not. I act A, but the other person acts B. From my point of view, even if the action of B chosen by the other party seems to be a roundabout way, there is no choice but to leave it to the other person’s judgment. It’s important to respect the other person if it’s not life-threatening.

There is something called the “mirror rule“.

As a common occurrence, when you pass each other in a narrow corridor, if you lean your body a little, the other person will also lean a little, so you can pass each other without bumping into each other. The other person sees your actions and unconsciously takes action so as not to bump into you in the same way.

In the same way, by taking action that you think is good, you will have some influence on those around you. Even if you can’t see it right away, the environment will change little by little.

You may be thinking, “No, I’m just pointing this out of consideration for the other person,” but what about your own feelings at that time? I’m sure you’re annoyed. It’s a mirror rule, so the other party will return frustration. As I wrote in You say it’s for someone, but is it really for someone? it’s never for someone.

Continuing to point out the other person’s actions can only create mutual opposition, but by dividing the other person as the other and me as me, things can go surprisingly smoothly.

When you act pleasantly, something pleasant will come back to you. When something happens that makes you feel bad, why not take a moment to reflect on your actions? A new mindset will help you grow.

You say it’s for someone, but is it really for someone?

About controlling yourself